It’s hard being home at times. I’m surviving okay but everyone was pretty much gone the whole day, so maybe it doesn’t count. I was up at 7:15 and got a good day’s work in. It’s nice going to bed at a decent hour. Played a few rounds of pool this evening, and I’m very relaxed despite the stress storm that surrounds me.

We have to take mom to the airport tomorrow, which is regrettably never a pleasant experience. Dad gets sad/jealous that she’s leaving but communicates that by bitching about everything and blowing everything out of proportion, which in turn makes mom snippy (not my dog) so if either my sister or I try to speak, she will shoot a mean glance, and so the long trip of silence begins. Therefore, my Vaio shall travel with me. I’ll have music and solitaire to keep me sane.

I made an observation today. I’m an adult. Had some kinks come up in our travel to the airport plans, so mom started freaking. I’d call it pre-game show to the car experience tomorrow. Mom & dad have been married for almost 23 years, and it amazes me that they still don’t understand each other. Mom freaks out and worries too much. Guess what? Dad does the same thing. Mom yells at the “kids” about stupid stuff when this happens, and dad just screams and cusses really loud, making mom snap more and more at us. It’s a vicious cycle. They both cuss each other, and it’s hilarious b/c they’re both doing the same thing but refuse to accept it.

My sister reacts to the situation the same way I used to, getting angry too and snapping at me. It helps nothing. I was proud of myself today, because I didn’t get angry that everyone was angry AND I made no conscious effort to be that way. Dad’s not a bad person; he just doesn’t know how to communicate his feelings through anything but anger—something I can completely understand. You just have to ignore the screaming and see through to what he’s really trying to say. I’m getting a lot better at this. Seems the more I understand me, the more I understand everyone else. Funny how that works, eh?

Ha, I didn’t intend to break out a big psychology post but well my fingers just sort of take off. However, I did intend to mention that part of my pre-bed routine is checking out my friend’s new photo journal. Takes about 15 min on dial-up but it’s worth it. He’s taking some great photos. I can always appreciate anyone’s work that expresses beauty in the details and the ordinary. Not sure if I’m supposed to share the link, but he can just yell at me if that’s the case. hehe.

And so goodnight, until this ending finds its new beginning.