I’ve been down the last few days. Nothing’s particularly wrong. Sometimes life just feels a bit out of sync, but I have faith everything will return to its rightful place in due time. I’ve been making a focused effort not to let myself get sad for no reason. For me, it’s a matter of having the willpower to pick yourself up. It’s too easy to fall in to a state of self-pity. So I’ve been cooking and baking and taking the walk home a bit slower—you know, smelling the roses and such. I made marvelous multigrain cookies, my champion 4-H cookies from ‘92. I think the only time I’ve made them since was helping teach my brother, so maybe 8 years ago. Adjusting to the new kitchen has been rough, but I think I have about worked out the functionality. Either way, it feels good to put time in to something with clear results. My jerk chicken (pictured) & wedges turned out to be amazing. I also think I’ve perfected recreating the sauce at Primo Patio. I enjoy a good challenge.

My place is really coming together and the small additions from Ikea definitely make it a bit more livable.

I’ve been busy at work the last couple days. Not overly busy, but just busy enough. It makes the days go by much faster, which is a nice feeling. I just like being able to appear helpful in some capacity. It doesn’t seem possible that I’d learn about something I’d never heard about practically everyday, but I do. Maybe I really am just *that* far behind. I have to be thankful, at least, that I’m a quick study. A menu that I’d been working on finally made it back to the original requester, one of the top creatives. He personally came over to thank me for it and 2 others passed on his compliments. The PM was like “I believe he even said it made his entire day.” It’s always nice to get feedback such as that.

Also, I had a project meeting today with a copywriter, so I got to hear the direction he was given. I’m writing my own script for practice, just to see how it compares to the pro one. I was struggling in the meeting because I wanted to spurt out video concepts and not info on how to layout the webpage, but then again, we all know I’m not much of an abstract visual person. I can do photography because I can see it, but at the end of the day, I live by words.

And you’d think after all that, my spirits would be improved, but I really am dragging. I think it’s nerves. Almost down to 7 days until Amsterdam, so I’m definitely in that “freaking out” stage that I always hit before a big trip, up to the point where I step off the plane. I could almost promise you that my thoughts on the way to and at the airport will be something along the lines of “Mindy, what the hell are you doing?” By the time I’m leaving the airport, it will be a bit harsher like, “You’re out of your fricken mind. This is gonna be weird. You’re gonna be weird. How awkward.” I’ve warned Diana about this quirk. I told her I’m totally fine once we see the people we’re visiting. My anxiety is just part of the process.

I think I need a bed. I know I need a bed. Lack of sleep is definitely bringing me down. I keep having crazy dreams and waking up in the night. I don’t try to remember the dreams, but I know they’re crazy by how my covers are kicked everywhere.

Oh, but I just watched a movie, Wristcutters: A Love Story. It won’t be on my favorites list, but I enjoyed it and would recommend watching it.

I can’t believe it’s already time for Thursday. Spindig is this Friday, so that should be good times. I think I’m gonna try out sleeping now. Hopefully, there aren’t too many ships on a Wednesday night. They were non-stop last night. I think I’m nearing that point where nights will sound empty without them though.

On a final note, I’ve been on a complete Doves kick for the last month or so. If you’re not a fan, you should be.