Listening to that song sparked memories of my dream last night. Evan, Johnny, Blaine, and I were on some mission. We stayed at my grandma’s house for a while. It was weird. They knew their way around my hometown. Johnny & Blaine went to see some “acro…” I believe it was a movie. Seems like this “movie” was some competitor of ours, so Johnny (who I think flashed to Steve Cooper at points) said, “It was amazing! Just unbelievable” Evan & I were like, “great, we’re screwed.” I recall scattered visions of us walking around the farm…

We all packed up to get back on the road, researching or something. I’ve forgotten a lot of the details, but I know there was something about me being asleep on the couch and I slept through something…oh, the movie I think. I was really out of it. As they were getting ready to leave, I said I needed to use the bathroom, so I ran back to the house. As I sat down, there was this frog sculpture sitting next to me. It kept trying to hop forward, so I put my hand over it to hold it still, semi-freaked out. It was very green and plastic looking. Eventually it broke lose and then tried hopping up on my lap and scratching at my leg. I reached down to it, and I was like “oh, you’re Snippy”. There was this odd moment where it was like I was in another dream in the dream and I was waking up to see that it was actually Snippy, not the frog, in my dream. When I woke up in real life, Snippy was sleeping, though. I woke up then because I really did need to use the bathroom.

There was just something out of place about the situation in the dream that I can’t put my finger on. I think I was pretty much out of my mind the entire time. Maybe the frog/snippy thing was actually me hallucinating in the dream. I did make it back to the car because I told Evan something about where we were going and that I still needed to sleep more before I could drive.

Well any wonders I’d had about going insane were sure put to rest by this dream…jeez. I don’t know what’s happening to me. Everything was going so well. I’m over the things in my past that had held me back, I’ve got a house, dog, job offers, and my sis & I are back to normal. I’m making a social life for myself (even if it’s just myself outside of my house), yet my work ethic has vanished. I don’t really care about anything except our big project and even that’s not much. I want to turn down the full-time job. What the hell is wrong with my brain? I hate everyday but Monday. I need someone to fucking set me straight. Oh god, it’s Thanksgiving week. Fuck, I didn’t even think about that, so maybe my subconscious isn’t completely over my past. I can’t talk about everything I need to on this thing. I can’t talk to anyone about it period. It’s hard. Damn, I just broke a promise to myself about writing posts when I’m depressed.