So tomorrow is Friday. Thank goodness. These last couple short weeks have seemed the longest yet. I felt like seeing a movie tonight and rather than waiting for a night when someone could actually go with me, I said “fuck this.” I had some leftover lasagna & some foccacia, a strange but tasty little bread. Due to the subzero temps this week (no exaggeration…my car read +1 degrees yesterday morning), I’d been postponing a trip to buy some CDs. So I made a trip to best buy before my movie and stocked up on some long overdue buys. The checkout gentlemen made nice conversation over my radiohead purchase. I made the one guy feel guilty for downloading the album for free.

So I pull in to the movie theater, foolishly thinking “who will be here on a thursday night?” It seems Thursday night is date night for the Carmel/Westfield kids. Awesome. As I waited in the long, winding line, I was hearing every couple…err guy who was paying…say “PS I Love You”, the movie I had chosen. I was beginning to regret my decision but persevered. I found a nice seat, surrounded by couples, and two moms took the remaining seats beside me. I was fearing this might become the low point of my existence.

But you know what? It wasn’t. I had a lot of fun. I enjoyed the movie. You really can’t go wrong with lingering views of Ireland’s countryside and cute guys with Irish accents. I laughed & cried with a room full of strangers. It was nice. Seriously, I was tearing up 10 minutes in to the movie. I was like “Seriously? We’re breaking this stuff out this early?” The mom next to me kept lowering her glasses to dab her eyes with a tissue. I seemed a heartless bastard compared to her.

So it was a fun night. I love my car. I set my ambient lighting to blue, and we did a little motoring about. I’m not gonna lie. My car is a bit of a show-stopper in the parking lots. I get giddy when I walk out and know it’s mine to drive.

So yeah, my purchases…Feist - The Reminder, Bright Eyes - Cassadaga, & Radiohead - In Rainbows. The Cassadaga packaging is pretty incredible. I played with it for awhile. And so, it makes me continue to wonder why people don’t buy CDs. I just feel like there’s something to be said for the act of roaming aisles to pick up a tangible piece of art that’s fun to look at & listen to. Plus, you have a high quality backup for your tunes. They’re just doing such innovative stuff with the packaging—you miss an entire part of the experience buying mp3’s.

Well, I should be heading off to bed soon. I have to be at work on time tomorrow. That’s becoming a constant struggle for me.

I found a job downtown for a “film & research coordinator” for the Heartland Film Festival. I have to fancy-up my resume and write a cover letter this weekend. I *need* to apply for this job. It sounds kind of amazing, and once I apply for the first job, applying for others will become less scary. It’s that first step that’s frightening. My lease runs out at the end of Feb, and I let the deadline to renew run past and I’ve lined up absolutely nowhere else to house myself. It’s not very smart, but I want to keep my options open. I essentially have 2 months of being tied to nothing, so I need to take advantage of every bit of it.

I’m not sure this is my dream job, but I’m quite fascinated by the idea of it, and it definitely has potential to lead to other things closer to what I think my dream is. I skipped to the bottom 10 (of 900) career matches on the career assessment test I took. The job I’m doing now was #890. I feel that explains why I feel so out of place. In fact, I didn’t come across a single IT-related job in the top 250 matches. However, my results also said I’ll typically use my skills to help people out when there is an immediate need/problem, and boy, do I. Too bad it gets me in trouble with my happiness level.

As mentioned, I’m still not 100% sure what my dream job is, but I really feel I’m narrowing in on it. I just have to take some risks, do what feels right, and cross my fingers because the whole idea of this scares & thrills me all at once.